S1 E5 - Our Queer Love Story – The Real Version (Plus, How We Keep the Fun Alive!)

💜 Love isn’t just romance—it’s ridiculous, playful, and full of inside jokes that make no sense to anyone but you and your partner. In this episode, we’re finally telling the real story of how we met—the awkward, the unexpected, and the downright chaotic.

We dive into:

✨ How we met (the official story vs. what actually happened)

✨ Why the early days of our relationship felt more like a buddy comedy than a rom-com

✨ The secret sauce to keeping the fun alive in long-term relationships (hint: it involves goblin mode, blanket forts, and bad song remixes)

✨ Why the smallest romantic gestures—like surprise coffee or hoarding love notes—mean everything

At the heart of it all? Love should be fun. Whether it’s through spontaneous silliness, shared weirdness, or just making the mundane magical, relationships thrive when you lean into joy.

📢 Got a chaotic love story of your own? DM us or drop it in the comments—we wanna hear it!

🔊 Listen now wherever you get your podcasts! 
(NOT available on Apple or Spotify 😊❤️)

#QueerlyCommitted #QueerPodcast #QCCommunity #LGBTQLove #QueerRelationships #LesbianCouple #IndiePodcast #PodcastLife #LGBTQContent #QueerConversations #LGBTQMentalHealth #StayWeirdStayCommitted #SapphicLove #LGBTQ+ #StayWeirdStayCommitted

Transcript

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(Transcribed by TurboScribe.ai. Go Unlimited to remove this message.) What is up, queerly committed fam? Welcome back to another episode of the podcast where we talk about love, life, and all the wonderfully chaotic things that come with being in a long-term queer relationship. I'm Eryn. And I'm Cori, and today we're finally telling the real and unfiltered version of our love story. Right. Sorry, mom. The good, the bad, and the wildly unexpected. And of course, we'll share how we keep things fun, silly, and a little weird, because if you're not laughing in your relationship, what are you even doing? That's correct, honestly. So let's just get into it. So, if you ask us how we met, we usually give a very simple answer. Right. It's online, like most modern sapphics do. I'm usually not one to get on apps at all. Actually, I don't get on apps. This was the first time I have downloaded a dating app in decades. A decade? Yeah? My age is showing. But I don't get on dating apps, which was fun. I don't think I realized that was your first dating app experience. It's me. LOL. Nailed it. Right. Yeah. I'd never gotten on a dating app or anything like that. But yeah, I was feeling pretty confident about myself. I was feeling good. And I had spent a considerable time single. Doing that self-love thing. Exactly. Doing that self-love thing. And I was like, you know what? I kind of want to flirt with somebody. I'm going to download these apps. And yeah, that's exactly what I'm going to do. So. Eryn builds a profile and only seeks out to flirt with a pretty face. And I build a profile and I only seek to get my back broke on a fairly regular basis with some level of, I don't know, goodness? I tried to make my profile as unhinged as possible so I didn't get matched with people that were not going to be for me. Because I wanted to get, like, if you're going to be offended - I wanted them out. Correct. There was just like, there was just a lot of things I put in there that was going to really make people that weren't meant for me just not even, like, message me. Which is the point. Weed them out from the beginning. Exactly. Weed them out from the beginning. Set those boundaries. Because I wasn't trying to, to be honest, I just didn't want to flirt with somebody that was lame as fuck. You know, I'm just not here for that. I was, if anything, I wanted somebody just as weird and unhinged as I was. So that's what I, you know, that was the vibe that I put out there. And in my profile I said that I am unapologetically weird, authentically myself, I use the f-bomb in paragraphs like it's pepper, and I'm a total wild card that has a whole bunch of pickup lines that you're gonna want to hear. And I did want to hear them. In fact, I sent a message that was never received, but I did send a message that was like, all right, let me hear all these pickup lines with a little fucking smirking emoji because I'm a brat. Yeah, that was when I had gotten a message saying that this wonderful woman liked my profile. I'm like, oh, who's this? And I like did a scan through real quick and right there then I was like, okay, I can see why, I can see why she is trying to match with me because I was talking about where the vibe's at. And also at the very bottom what I noticed was brat. And I was like, oh, a brat? Ayo. I'm in, count me in, let's do this. So I go ahead and I swipe back and then we were matched and there wasn't a message from her. I didn't get the message that she sent. So the first message was, brats are cute. And when I got that message, I kind of panicked a little bit because I was like, wait, what the fuck? What happened to my message that I sent? But it was fine because at least conversation was happening. But I was a little disappointed I never got to hear those pickup lines. We just got straight to it with the, the brat taming as one might call it. Yeah. She replied with, yeah. So what are you going to do about it? And well, that's a great question. I'm glad you asked. And I'm so glad that I asked that question. Me too. So I met with that question. I was just like, okay, I like this attitude here. There's this, there's all right. I can, I can dig this. So of course I had to reply with that same energy. And I said, well, that all depends, but I can assure you any course correction is in your best interest because I know what is best for you. And then at that moment, at that moment, Cori and two other adults sat around this message with mouths agape, wondering how the fuck to respond to it. Cause I wasn't sure. They said I was on my own and I came up with my big girl pants and I came up with a message and it must've gone well because eventually we decided to meet. Right. Yeah. I can't remember how the, after that, I can't remember how the ball started rolling. I think it was, uh, you, uh, made a comment or like commended me on my, uh, snapback. I think that's, I think that's what happened. And then we continued conversation and then we agreed that we're like, yeah, okay, so then we'll let, let's go. This, this, this, this is working out. We're going to continue to talk because, uh, I'm witty, you're witty. And, uh, yeah, it just made sense to keep the conversation going. So truly the alchemy was there from the beginning. Right. Like we had all of the perfect ingredients to allow for conversation to flow so naturally. And it was really good conversations too. It was very deep conversations. We, you know, we were essentially building a foundation of if this is like, if this is where you're at, this is where I'm at and yeah. Okay. We can do that. We can, we can do that for that. Right. Cause truly at that point still I was on board with like weekend visits or whatever, you know? Right. And I'd like, I was looking for seasonal work, my friend. I was just looking to flirt. And then I decided to, you know, take the, uh, offered position, so to speak. And, uh, you passed the interview with flying colors. Yeah. I was, yeah, I was told that I would, and I, she told me I was in an interview too. I did. She told me I was an interview and I was like, all right, well, okay, this is cool. We ended up building a really strong foundation. And, um, then it was mentioned, you know, I wouldn't mind being more than just a regular, you know, occasional backbreaking like, well, you know, let's not, uh, let's not put anything, you know, let's not put any labels on it, but I'm not, not interested in that. So we can just kind of see where it goes from there. And yeah. Yeah. And at that point I, I can recognize that I wanted to establish early on that. Yes, I was clear with my intentions and also, um, update things are going well. And I thought you should know I was very forward about it. And as with all of our communication, it really has been as clear as I can be. And I have found that this style of communication works best for me. It is, it is who I am authentically. It's who I am genuinely. So it, it allowed me a space to just be me in a full creative sense and exploring what that looked like with you was so cool just from the beginning. Right. And that was a, yeah, like you said, communication was huge. It was, um, our communication was so clear. There was no leading on. Yeah. Yeah. Let's do that. There was no leading on, you know, we were both in agreeance to what was, you know, this, our situation, what it was going to be. And we also laid down a strong foundation of things that will not happen, things we won't accept and just general fuckery that we're not going to deal with. So if there's general fuckery, if it's, you know, and if it ends up that we don't, you know, hit it off when we meet, then it's not a big deal because we already knew that that was going to be a thing going into this is that right now, things are going good. Vibes are right. And if we're not for each other, cool, we can, as Cori put it, shake hands like gentlemen and call it a day. That's correct. Chip, chip, cheerio. And then we realized, and we found ourself in a space where we were communicating regularly, virtually over the phone and talking, and we wanted to make this an in-person situation. And we really just wanted to meet in person. So when we decided to do that, I feel like when most people think of new relationships and that first meet, it's kind of this movie magic moment, right? Like perfect dates, slow motion, eye contact, the hair is blowing in the wind and you know, I'm just glowing from head to toe in all of my fucking glory, which I do on a regular basis. But all of that to say, ours was more like a buddy comedy with lots of fucking make-outs. Yeah. She was going through the city a day earlier than we were supposed to meet. And I was like, come pick me up. And she agreed. I was like, oh shit. She actually agreed. Shit. Now what do I do? I got ready. And she came and picked me up and I just blanked out. I didn't know where to go. I didn't know what to do. I was like, where do we go? I was like, uh, turn, turn left here. So she turned left and we just start going down to, um, down the road. And I was like, well, in my head, I'm like, well, we can go into a public space where there's lots of people. So we'll just go there. It'll make it, you know, easy cause plenty of people around. So I, I direct her to this space. Right. And there we are in this parking lot guys. I fucking, I didn't mean to, and I didn't realize it at the time, but I gave her directions right into the U-Haul parking lot. Yeah. I was like, uh, is this a joke? Like, like, are we, is this how we're starting this off? You know what I mean? Like you're taking me to a U-Haul parking lot so we can, what, be girlfriends. I love that. And then are we going to get a truck? It's like, are we just going to, you know, yeah, we're gonna, are we just getting the truck right now? Right. Are we, are we, are we skipping that? Like, I mean, I know I said I was interested in more than a regular back breaking, but like, damn bro, we went from part-time seasonal work to full send all the way. And we did full send throughout, but it was, it was at a pace that was comfortable with both of us. And it was something that we talked about a lot. Yeah. We kept communication at all times and not just about our feelings, but, um, other things in our lives as well. You know, uh, things that we had happened in the past, things that we are, uh, breaking ourselves out of, like, you know, old patterns that no longer serve us. And we just really, really got deep when it came to knowing each other. Yeah. And, and it really, I think what was most helpful for me in getting to know you was how you got to learn yourself. You walking me through that process of your journey of self-discovery helped me learn you all while you reiterated all of that. You know what I mean? Which made you feel more solid, I would imagine, you know, not to assign feelings to you, but like, I could imagine that being something that I would be like, yeah, look at the shit I did. And I'm so fucking proud of that too. Yeah. I put in a lot of work. Yeah. Literally. I literally, I realized that I didn't know who I was. So when I say that I put in the work, I mean, I literally bulldozed down the building, the building and started over and I really connected with myself on a very personal level because I realized that I wasn't my name. I wasn't the things that I do. I wasn't my hobbies, the music I listened to. And I wanted to know who Eryn really was underneath everything. So I put in a lot of work and it happened to be some of the most scary and dark times of my life, but it was the best thing ever that could have, that could have ever happened to me because of that. I now know who I am and I don't accept anything less than I deserve. So. Right. Like Vanilla Ice said, anything less than the best is a felony. Facts. Fucking facts. And it is. So. It really is. And when you come to the table with that expectation of I know what I deserve, I know what I will and will not tolerate from the perspective of I am my own keeper. I am my own protector. And I am also the same one that will release the floods. Yeah. Get your fucking ark. No, that's a little Jesus-y. Uh, get your canoe? Listen, I've released your ark, so. Yeet. The ark of the covenant. The floods. Oh, yeah."We named the dog Indiana..." See, okay, and that's exactly this. So, we have inside jokes that have no business being funny and we have entire conversations that make sense to only us. We could be in a serious moment and one of us goes full goblin mode and the other knows, you know, what's happening and just goes right along with it. It's like a secret language at this point because both of us have this ongoing, um, we have like a jukebox in our head that is a jukebox in our head that is full of music information but also movie references and we understand but there's also memes and the the reels and videos and all of the other little things we've got so much overlap in culture that it's absolutely a secret language at this point. Right. It's a combination of everything all at once and only us will get the reference. You might be able to pick out a couple things here and there but you're like, boy, that doesn't even go together. I'm like, yeah, smash the memes together. Let's go. But it keeps things fun, you know, and I think that's super important. You know, I like to, I told you that I fully embrace my inner child. Right, because bitches don't know about your dollhouse. Right, bitches don't know about my dollhouse. I know it. I know it. You know, life is fucking stressful and if you're not going to make room for playfulness then you're fucking doing it wrong. That's right because, I mean, like we make blanket forts all of the time like that and we fully commit to that too and we make up new lyrics to songs that totally change the meaning of everything entirely usually based on whatever's going on. If it's about doing the dishes then that's what it's about. Right, yeah. We just, we're silly gooses at inappropriate times pretty much. Yeah, I was told this week in fact that I needed to compose myself. You, you were laughing at a very inappropriate time. Listen, I really couldn't help it and it's, I'm not gonna say it wasn't my fault. It absolutely was my fault and I couldn't help it. I was trying not to laugh and if you were gonna laugh then I was gonna laugh and when you, when you lost your shit, I almost lost my shit. The only thing I could do was to think of compose yourself. Like, you said that with a tone that felt like my mother was present and you were gonna use my full legal name. You know what it was, I was jealous that you got to laugh and I didn't. That's what it was. I was like, you were, I was living vicariously through you. Like, I, that's what I wanted to do. You did exactly what I wanted to do and, yeah. And it was loud. I didn't mean for it to be loud and I think that also startled me and helped me to gain my composure more quickly. So, thank you for being the adult in the room. Right. Yeah, I blend a good combination of adulting and embracing my inner child, so. Absolutely. There is a good balance to be had and speaking of balance, we also keep the romance and the ridiculous. A lot of people like to think that the keeping the romance alive means some big grand gestures and honestly, it's the small and wonderful things that make it so special. In fact, as we record this, Valentine's Day is right around the corner. No, actually, as we record this, Valentine's Day is this weekend. So, I told my lovely wife, I said, hi, babe, I would like to share a feeling with you and my thoughts and feelings on Valentine's Day and I said to her, my darling, my love, either you love me 365 days out of the year and you show up for all of them or you do not love me at all and that is fine, but let us not waste anyone's time. And she said, oh, thank you. You're not one of those. And I said, yes, good. Now that that is settled. I do still also like flowers because I do like flowers, but my point is don't celebrate a hallmark holiday so that you could feel better about yourself for not loving me the other 364 days. I said what I said and I did not stutter. And it's a good thing that I do love you every single day. Oh, you do. You know, it'd be real awkward if you didn't. Wouldn't it? It'd be kind of like, oh, what are we doing? Yeah, it'd be, it'd be really fucking awkward, but no, it's, it's, I don't like Valentine's Day. I think it's cheesy as fuck. I think it's shitty that you have one day out of the year where you're supposed to get pampered and treated well. Like, no, that shit should be happening every single fucking day. Every day. Right. It should be fucking happening every single fucking day. And yeah, so I don't participate in Valentine's Day because I think it's bullshit, but you know, yeah. And honestly it, it is bullshit. It's, it's consumerism. Right. It's consumerism and it's, it's a cis man's holiday. It's a white cis man's holiday. Yeah. She doesn't forget though. She knows. She remembers. Who, me? No, just any women in general. Oh yeah. No, she does remember. Right. It's just like, and that's. I don't, but she does. Right. I, I don't, I would, I would hate to be the woman that gets excited for Valentine's Day simply because it's the only day that she ever feels appreciated. That, that's, yeah, that, that's I don't like that. So fuck Valentine's Day, but I love my wife 365, 24 seven. So does not apply to me. Correct. I've been that person in a relationship who has experienced looking forward to holidays or special occasions to be noticed. Yeah. Shingle, shingle, shingle. Can you put a little sparkle on notice? Because honestly it felt like I was fucking invisible for some periods of time. We can cut that because it doesn't matter. I'm not living in the past. Right. My point is. It's the little things that make things special. You're right. Absolutely. It, it really is. Like if you get me coffee in the morning, I act like you have invented love itself because you understand the importance of coffee in my life and I know that you do. And if I leave a little note somewhere, I know that you're going to really appreciate it and you're going to stick it in your wallet and read it from time to time. I'm a sentimental little goblin. Well, it's an ancient, now it's going to be considered an ancient artifact and very precious. Precious. It's because I'm a sentimental little goblin and I stand by that. I mean, like people don't write notes anymore. So I, you know, and you can read my handwriting, which is really cool. Oh yes, of course. That's fun. That's the, that meant a lot. I was like, you mean you can understand my hieroglyphics? Of course I can. Perfect. Perfection. Great. Then I shall continue to write letters to you in little notes. Itty bitty notes on little teeny tiny pieces of paper. And send them by dove. Yes. What, what, what bird do people use to send? Carrier pigeon. Send them via carrier pigeon. Can I send it by a crow instead? Oh, please. Actually, I would prefer that very strongly. Crows bring shiny things. Want to make friends with a crow. Yes. They just stay shitting on the cars, but they don't shit on my car. So that's a cool thing. Yeah, exactly. It's you're friends with the crows. And yeah. Yeah. Exactly. But we digress. I don't know if that's when in Rome. No, that doesn't apply here. No, but all of that to say that love should be fun. Right. Because at the end of the day, our relationship works because we never stop playing. We don't stop laughing. And we don't stop choosing each other. Even when it gets messy. Right. Facts. And if you're listening to this and wondering how to keep the spark alive - lean into your fucking weird. Please. Just go duct tape shit crazy. Be your authentic self and find the joy in the most random moments. That's where all the fucking magic is straight up. Be your authentic self. Yes. Like be your genuine authentic self. It doesn't matter because "those who mind do not matter.......and those who matter do not mind."- Dr. Seuss. He was an awful person. I mean, yeah, that too. He was a fucking awful person, but God damn it. I loved those. I loved his books. Yeah. There was really good lessons in there. He should have written one on how not to be a piece of shit. Yeah. Maybe we won't use that quote because we don't need to quote pieces of shit, right?"I eat pieces of shit like you for breakfast..." Exactly what I was fucking thinking. Thank you, Shooter McGavin. No, you will attract the right people into your life. If you're your authentic self. I know I did. Yeah. I just let it laid it out there. I'm like, let me be the most fucking highest weirdest unhinged self that I can be. And it's going to really weed out the motherfuckers that fucking want to talk to me. And it did. And I'm married. Yep. I married someone that I am absolutely enthusiastically in love with. And who's that? It's you. Oh, I know that. And yeah, it's, it's good stuff. It's very good stuff. Do the work. Love yourself. You'll find, you'll find that person. It'll come to you. You know, love will come to you. You don't need to chase that shit. Do you. Be yourself. Love will find you. Swears. Yeah. We're a testament to that, you know? Yeah. 100%. And really, honestly, like, let your freak flag fly. Yes. Please. Do the things. Say the weird things. Yeah. Say the weird things. Do the weird things. People want to hear it. I promise you they do. They do. I know they do. I'm watching it. Yeah. But where was I going? There was something I was thinking. Let your freak flag fly. Yeah. Being weird authentic. Yeah. Thank you. Let your freak flag fly. It is so freeing. Oh my god. Like, deep breath, everybody. Same time. Yeah. It's okay. Everything's all right. Be you. Be lovely. Be queerly committed. I don't know how to. Fuck yeah. Be queer. Be queer. Be weird. Be you. Be authentic. Be genuine. Be the best you that you can be. Absolutely. Join the army. Jesus. No. See, this is why. Right? Yeah. Yeah. So, listen. Don't join the army. Yeah, don't. If you're not yourself, you're going to have a bad time because you're pretending to be somebody that you're fucking not, and then when your masks come off, your relationship is going to fucking go pear-shaped, and then you're going to be like, what happened? It's because you weren't your fucking self. So, do the fucking weird shit. Be the fucking weird person that you are. Lean into that shit. Be fucking yourself. I mean, don't fuck yourself. I mean, unless you want to, that's fine, but just be your goddamn self because there's no better feeling than being your authentic self. It is the highest vibration that you can be, you know? Yeah. So, do it to it. I'm the Gonzo. I don't care. I was the Pee-Wee Herman. I don't care. That's who I am. That's how I roll, and yeah. My wife's also unhinged like me. Yes. She's a different unhinged, though. I am. I am a secretly unhinged individual. She masks it. Yeah, I'm taking it off. She masks it in public, but not at home. She is her lovely self when we are together, and I love her for who she is, and yeah, I would not change her for anything in the world, and I always encourage her to be her authentic self because that's who I want to be with, and if you think that it's going to make me want to run away, then I definitely want you to be your authentic self because it's not going to make me want to run away. It's going to make me want to be like, let's get into some shit because this is going to be fun. So, yeah.